Post after hiatus

3237 miles apart. 17 days since he left to Perth. 2 days until Valentine’s Day.

These are just figures. I wish.  I only cried for two days after he left to pursue his studies and career in nursing there in the land down under. Quite weird? No? Sigh.

I’m doing good here. I hope so. Being busy with work keeps me focused and shrug off missing him. Well, I miss my whole life when he’s still around. I miss going out with him, his cousins and sister. I almost gave up all of my free time just to be with him. And I don’t have any regrets. At all. Even though that means time for watching basketball and watching him sleep. 

I’m missing him more now. :’( Sometimes I wonder if we really can survive this set-up. But this morning, I was able to get an overseas call from him. Yay! Kilig! <3 Haha. It really means a lot to me. Because a week since he left, I felt like he didn’t make much effort to catch up with me. Yeah, I know. Because he is still adjusting there. He’s living with his aunt and everything is shouldered by his aunt’s family. 

We were fighting just last week because of this misunderstanding. It was really difficult for me because I was used to texting him everything that I do. I can call him anytime whenever he’s not replying promptly. But now. It’s very difficult. It takes a lot of patience and understanding just to make us cool. It’s difficult to have fights much especially petty fights because we cannot resolve them sooner. Usually it takes hours before we can talk again. That is, a good thing, because we keep our cool. Our concerns do not become issue between us anymore.

I think we just cope with the situation. But it really scares me because what if this distance would make us forget each other? What if he finds another woman? What if I found someone else? I’m really really scared because I promised of not leaving him. That he is the only one and that I will wait for him. It was a good news knowing that his classes were shortened to a year instead of two years. Even before we’re not yet a couple, he already mentioned his plans of settling down abroad. This time, it’s with me. I could feel the pressure already because I think our relationship is still not yet matured enough to go to that level. Or just me?  I am not yet ready. I am only turning 25 this year and I am not yet satisfied with my accomplishments and my youth.

You know what really concerns me? It’s because he’s asking me to be with him after two years without even asking for a wedding proposal!!! My gaaaahd!!! But anyway, I’m hoping for the best. This year, physically without him, I’d do things I missed doing when I was still single. That includes bumming myself over the internet on weekends, watching movies/series, reading books, hanging out with my bestest friends. Gosh! So many things to do, so little time!

Oh well.