I am a very transparent person. I cry when I feel like crying. And by crying I mean like a baby crying! I am easily amused and my happiness is surely shallow. That's how true I am to myself. I don't need anybody's approval of my behavior or whatsoever. Yes I know my thinking won't make me loved by people around me but at least I know I'm not fooling them..and myself.
That's why I am saddened when a person close to my heart accused me of being fake. Of using her. Well, as I said I do not have to defend myself because my conscience is clean. Her harsh words against me were really degrading and demoralizing. At first, I only thought of it as her outburst of anger but it's been two weeks now and she still doesn't want to talk to me in person.
I feel sorry for her. She was devoured by the blindness of being her as the "victim". Well, I have done everything I could do to save our friendship. It's all in her hands now.
For everything that happened, I am not regretting any of it. Maybe this is the way for her to realize what has really "changed". I just wish her all good luck and best of health to her whole family. Because karma has its own way of bitching. And that must be really to be afraid of.
Saddening but that must be really it. Truth really does hurt. If our friendship is the price to pay for her to change or just to wake her up from this ''dream", then so be it.
